Being Perfectly Imperfect
Today, my wish for you – if this is relevant to you right now – is that you take a break from being perfect.
Let me explain:
I had a great visit with gorgeous Paula, my lash lady from Evelyn Rose Lashes. When you have your eyes closed and you can’t move, well for me, it’s like therapy. We always have the most amazing chats and in today’s ‘therapy’, we ended up talking about those motivational quotes that get shared on Facebook. You know the ones. We’ve all shared them right?
They’re amazing and inspirational and sadly, I, like so many people other people, felt so far removed from their message of positivity. So why did I share them? And why will I continue to do so?
Some years ago I was walking through Farmers and bumped into a lady I knew. She looked pretty rough. On asking her how she was, she put on a brave face and told me “Great”.
On asking how I was, I said: “Pretty crap really. Absolutely struggling and having a really dark day.” She almost looked joyful.
She replied: “I’m so pleased to hear that! I thought I was the only one feeling like that! When I see your posts on Facebook, it seems you have a charmed life and that you’re ‘Little Miss Sunshine’.” I’m hoping my look of utter shock in response to her joy, wasn’t obvious.
I didn’t quite know how to respond. Was I living a lie? WAS I A FREAKING FRAUD???
The reality is, we’re all human right? We all have crap days and we all experience joy. I realise now that I shared those quotes not for everyone else, but for myself.
In my experience of dealing with trauma, grief, the depressive experience and all that goes with it, I’ve learnt one thing: what you focus on get’s bigger.
Pick at a scab, it gets bigger or doesn’t heal. Knead bread dough, it get’s bigger and more delicious. (I FREAKING LOVE BREAD). In both situations, there’s a focus of attention.
Me sharing those crap quotes was not for anyone else. It was for me: drawing my attention away from picking a scab and choosing to knead delicious dough.
I now consciously choose to focus on the positive, not for anyone else, but purely for myself. Some days it’s really easy, other days I require a little assistance: one of those quotes, a funny cat video or a drive in the car to look at the scenery.
I’ve stopped beating myself up for not being perfect: In fact I’ve learnt to embrace my perfect imperfections…..which I call my uniqueness……and that is my wish for you today.
Be unique. Be you. And stop picking those scabs.